East coast

Hey,

so a few days since Ive managed to get on the internet, so ill try and give a good idea of whats happened...

After a nights sleep in toms house, (well...i say a nights sleep, but i mean being woken up by a girl going "WHO THE FUCK ARE THEY?" to Tom when she got in from a night out...she was goin mental at him for letting us sleep there, awkward.) We loaded the van with boards and hit the beach...the conditions were terrible but we had a go anyway...we were worse than the conditions.

Drove on back to Melbourne where Toms parents had offered us a night's stay...nice people, actually really nice people...sat and had a beer with the whole family.

Dave, who I was at uni with, now lives in Melbourne so I went and met him later than night in the city centre...which is beautiful at night. We hit the casino, as we used to do in leeds on the regs...I won 50 dollars. Dave is working in a box factory, basically packing boxes for 6 hours a day...getting paid 20 dollars an hour...unbelievable.

Next day we set off on the looooong journey back to Sydney, roughly 900km. I had a couple of Monster energy drinks and did a 6 hour stint til 1.30 am...needless to say, it took ages to sleep as I was pretty much shaking.

So after hours of endless driving, we managed to get past Sydney, on through Newcastle and stopped at Coffs harbour (Ive now been to Newcastle in both South Africa and Australia before Ive even set foot in the real one.) Coffs was nice enough, few beaches and a big pier which I jumped off into the sea...The weather was getting a bit minging so we moved on. Then the weather went really bad and a massive storm hit...we were right into the eye, could hardly see as it was now dark and the rain was smashing into the windscreen. It was an awesome storm though.

Crashed in a little park that had BBQ's, had some burgers and a beer for dinner then hit the hay...a couple of hours later, a load of 'bogans' (chavs) parked up, wacked their headlights on, got out of the car and had a big discotheque. Loudest thing ever, and the worst music imaginable...it didnt help that they played the same shite song a thousand times either.

We finally made it to Byron Bay, which is where I am now...It was sunny so we went up to the lighthouse on Cape Byron, to see the views and the Dolphins, really beautiful stuff.

Booked a surf lesson, which seemed wise after our performance in Melbs...Had that yesterday and it was awesome, stood up nearly every wave, and even pulled off a little trick...cant wait to get back on the board.

As it was Saturday last night, we hit the town...had a few drinks with people in the campsite and got a taxi in to the centre. Wasnt the best night in the world...full of 18 year old gap yar students...not ideal. Still better than Ballare.

And thats abooout it...just chilling off the hangover today, heading to Nimbin tomorrow which is meant to be pretty good.

Hope everyone is well, and Ill blog again when I next get on the internet

Cheers x

Like a Gypsy

Hey everyone,

This is going to be quite a big blog...

Our last day in Campbell town was spent visiting the Blue mountains (they are called blue mountains because the Eucalyptus gives off a blue haze) Was a nice little day and some pics are on facebook.

So we picked up the Camper (which we named Helen...Hell for short.) After being briefly shown how the appliances worked by a distracted Hungarian, we set off to the supermarket to fill her up.

Entering the supermarket car park, we had to drive up the ramp and round the corner. I was driving. I managed to scrape Helen along the wall. Helen was hurt. She now has a massive scrape on the left hand side, dread to think how much that'll cost.

We stocked up on noodles, beans, bread and rice. Decided to sit and make lunch in the car park, beans on toast...well, I say toast, but I mean fried bread...as we have no toaster. We looked like a right group of Gypo's sat on folding chairs eating beans on fried bread on our laps...all topless. People were driving past looking at us. I was wondering how Id react if I was pulling up at Tesco car-park and saw three topless lads sat by a camper van eating from their laps.

We left the supermarket car park...but not before bumping the roof on a low hanging sign...onto Melbourne, which is over 1000km from Sydney, so itl take a few days with some stop-overs.

Hit the beach in Wollongong for an hour or so...Craig and I went into the sea to body surf, while Chris had a lay down. We got absolutely battered in the sea, the waves were mental.

Headed to Jervis Bay, which was a beautiful place...lovely white sandy beaches, along with shower and toilet facilities. Seemed like it was free as well, so that was a bonus.

It only took us about 45 minutes to work out how to set the beds up. When we finally managed it, we realised that there really isn't much room in Helen. Two have to sleep next to each other, with one sleeping in the roof bit. Im so glad I'm not Claustrophobic.

Day 2

Woke up to find a ticket on our windscreen saying we needed to pay 30 dollars camping fee...lovely.

Sorted that out and had a walk on Murray beach before setting off to Pebble beach.

Craig had absolutely no money, plus he hadnt loaded money onto his cash card as he was waiting for a cheque to clear. Chris and I had been lending him money but we'd run out. We needed internet.

We pulled over at a motel to ask if we could use the internet for five minutes...the woman said that she couldnt get on the internet as it was password protected, but she was heading home and would let us use her internet...unbelievable...I couldn't see that happening in England. Imagine a woman inviting three strange men into her home to use the internet...wouldnt happen.

Her name was Phillipa and she had a pet Pirana.

Got to Pebble beach, which has loads of Kangaroos that go on the sand and sometimes into the sea a little bit. Was an awesome place, and had free BBQ's...we wacked some snags on (sausages, remember) and had hot-dogs with whiskey. The woman who ran the site cam over and was going on about paying, so we headed off.

That night we stayed at a magnificent 4 star motel, called the Comfort Inn...The facilities were second to none, with room service, laundry and a swimming pool...we were in the carpark.

Day 3

After the worst nights sleep ever, we realised it was raining, and it didnt look like it was going to get better. The decision was made to go for a massive drive so that the following day it would only take an hour or so to get to Melbourne.

Drove most of the day before getting to a place called Lake Entrance for dinner. We cooked up some rice and veal and sat on a park bench with a beer. Just as we're tucking in we hear 'hey' coming from behind us..we turned around and I responded "Hey, hows it going?"... he replied with "How do you know me?...why did you just say hey Doug?"

This man clearly had special needs of some sort, possibly Autism, but Im not sure.

This is how the conversation went:

"I like to look cool"

"Ah ok"

"I bought some new shoes, they're velcro"

"ah thats cool"

"I want to be a builder"

"thats a good job"

"I like the uniforms"

"ok"

"Do you wear uniforms?"

"No I dont work at the moment, we're ju-"

"catch you later"

And Big Doug was gone.

Luckily, Craig and Chris just sat trying not to laugh, which meant I had to keep up the sort-of-conversation on my own. Cheers lads.

Drove on til nightfall...Found a little rest type place that had a few caravans in...It was free and had toilets so we decided thats where we'd sleep for the night. The toilet block was disgusting. As you walked into the mens side, a big spray painted piece of graffiti read: "REAL MEN EAT COCK" ... do they?

There was also a needle bin. Whenever there is a bin specifically designed to stored used needles, you know there are, or have been heroin addicts popping about. fantastic.

We managed to survive the night, despite our growing fears of being raped, murdered or both. Also, the threat of accidentally standing on a used needle was high. Luckily nothing bad happened.

Day 4

We hadnt showered for over 24 hours, nor had we charged our phones.

The aim was to find a proper camp site and use all their facilities, before speeding off without paying any fees. Managed to find a caravan site/golf course. Hooked up the camper to the electricity supply and got the phones charged. I wandered over to the golf club and found a big changing room with toilets and hot showers...jackpot, ding ding.

While packing the camper, ready to hit the road, a guy came over. We thought, 'oh here we go' . I took the lead and immediately started a conversation about the weather and how it was perfect for a round of golf. This got him going. He never mentioned paying any fee's, but he did break the news about Japan. Its the first we'd heard of it. Chris had just come from there, so it was a bit weird.

I think so far, there's been over 3 big natural disasters since I left England. Not to mention all the floods.

We finally made it to Melbourne, but we had literally no idea where to go, or where to keep the camper. Drove around for a while and found a little car park by an Aussie Rules pitch. There were no toilets, or showers or anything.

It was a Saturday, so we thought it would be rude not to go out.

After drinking a few beers and whiskeys in the camper we headed into town on the tram. Went into one place for a drink then attempted to get into a place called rats. We were denied. The old rule of 'not being allowed in if you have a penis' is in place here.

After another rejection, we ended up in a place called "Sorry Grandma", it was only 20 dollars to get in, and 8 dollars a beer...so...value.

Day 5

When you wake up with a massive headache, and you need a wee like never before, and when you've just slept for 4 hours in a hot, cramped van with two other men, you dont feel so pretty.

Thankfully, Tom, who we met while tubing in Laos lives by a beach near Melbourne. He invited us to stay over.

So thats where we are now, lounging around in his living room, watching step brothers on the TV...They have a games room with a ping pong table. This house is basically a blokes paradise.

We're having a beach day tomorrow, so hopefully the surf will be up.

Well this has taken a long time to write...and im still hanging from last night so its time to get off the net.

Will write again soon x

Campbell Town

Hey everyone, been a while but had a pretty busy few days here in sunny Australia.

So, staying here in Campbell Town, about an hours train ride away from Sydney. The place we are staying at is "on res" as they say here, which is basically uni halls. Margot has been amazing host, sorted us out with beds etc and introduced us to the gang.

When we arrived, we hit the supermarket straight away, bought a load of pasta and sausages (a.k.a snags)...Then we went to the big alcohol shop to get some boxed wine (a.k.a Goon) as this is the cheapest way to drink in Aus. Its about 8/9 dollars for a 4 litre box of wine. When compared to the 40 dollars for a crate of beer, thats pretty good.

That night there was a special offer on at the "Tav" which is where all the uni people eat, so we tagged along...Chicken Schnitzel with chips for 6 dollars, and washed it down with a "Scooner" (no idea if thats spelt correctly) of beer. A scooner is basically a glass that is between a half-pint and a pint. All the guys here are really friendly...obviously we've been on the end of some banter as we are the only "poms" about.

Incase you havent noticed, everything has a nick-name in Aus.

Friday was BBQ day, so wacked the snags on the barbie and the Goon out of the fridge...was awesome just sat there all afternoon in the sun drinking and eating...not to mention playing ping-pong and pool. That night was the "Chill-out western" themed evening at the common room. This was basically a cowboy type do, where people dressed up, drank, and had a go on the mechanical bull outside. I had a go. I was rubbish. Good job I havent any plans on riding a real bull.

Was a great night.....eventful too...a highlight of which would be Chris getting into a very loud argument with a girls whose name escapes me....at 3am. It was something to do with American naivety...Either way it ended up in Chris getting very very red and angry. It was hilarious.

I slept on the sofa with a blow-up doll with Tashi's face stuck to the head. The picture is on facebook...brilliant.

(just to clear that up, I was fully dressed thank you very much.)

Saturday was Mardi-Gras in Sydney...a massive gay-parade for gays. Its quite gay. We were all going to go down and watch the gayness but it rained...The hour journey there and back didnt seem too worth it if we were going to get rained on (that is NOT a euphemism). So we stayed in and watched dvds etc.

Sunday was spent at one of Margot's friends uni houses...It has a swimming pool so we had a load of Goon and snags...Also played Killer which went down a storm yet again.

Watched 2 entire series of The Inbetweeners last night with the Aussies...They were lovin it. We were about to hit the hay when Me Myself and Irene started...we stayed up to watch it and went to bed afterwards, woke up at gone midday and have done pretty much nothing besides playing mario-kart and doing laundry...Oh Ive missed Uni life.

Tomorrow we are going to get off our arses and hit the blue mountains for a bit of a bush walk, meant to be very scenic...could do with the fresh air and exercise.

I apologise for the brief descriptions of events in this blog, but Im writing this on a MacBook and Im obviously not cool enough to work these properly yet.

We have the camper all booked up and ready to pick up on wednesday...43 days on the road...in a camper...with 3 other men...in the heat. NOT gay.

Anyway, I hope everyone is OK and Ill blog again when I can

See ya later poms

Jay

Part 2 - Australia.

G'day, (would've been rude not to say that)

So, yes, I'm here in Sydney...Arrived yesterday morning from Bangkok...

Before I go into Australian escapades, best cover the last few days in Thailand...

The last blog was written 2 days into the Angkor Wat tour...The final day was quite a laugh actually...Our regular Tuk Tuk driver, Mr B was unavailable for the day, so he came and introduced us to his mate, Tiger Rob, who would be driving us around for the day. He looked a bit like Tiger Woods, but smaller...and more Cambodian (also, he confessed that he had a much smaller 'lingam' than Tiger Woods, one can only assume he meant his man-shaft). He was a right laugh.

Drove for over an hour to get to the temples...the first bit wasn't strictly a temple, its a river carving. You walk for 1.5km up through jungle 'til you reach a river (well, it was mainly river bed as its dry season)...and there a load of carvings of various Hindu gods on the river bed. We had a mooch about and I noticed a trail leading into the jungle on the other side of the river bed...I hopped over and walked up the track for a bit...Didnt lead to much so I kept going to see where it led...Walked for a quite a bit before giving up and turning round. I got lost. For a while. It was hot. I got more lost. I got caught up in the trees. I got really hot. I got annoyed. I decided I needed to find which direction I should walk in to get back to the river so I shouted "Hello!"... nothing...shouted again...nothing. Walked a bit more, got more lost, got more hot, got more tangled. Shouted again...this time I could hear a little "hello?" in the distance. But I could tell which direction it was coming from so hacked my way in that direction...Eventually I could hear voices getting nearer and nearer til I popped up back at the riverbed, just about 100 yards away from where I started. Craig was there, so we went down to the waterfall bit which is where you're actually meant to walk. Unfortunately it wasn't much of a waterfall due to the dry season.

Saw another temple a bit later, which was similar to the temples of previous days...It was impressive, but when compared to the others, it seemed pretty average. (I mean, it obviously wasn't average...but in comparison).

On the way back, the Tuk Tuk driver, Tiger, pulled up at a house on the side of the road. There were a few kids running about, and a woman cooking some stuff on a BBQ. He waved us over to a table they prepared for us; we sat and were given some shrimp-type-fried-flat-things and some palm wine. The palm wine is served in a big bamboo shoot and was actually pretty tasty. After a couple of these, Tiger was noticeably drunk so we headed off.

That night, Mr B came to meet us at our guesthouse to go out for a few drinks. We hit a few bars and played pool, usual stuff.

Back to Bangkok...Decided we'd make the most of our last couple nights in Thailand and planned a night out in Sukhumvit. It was mental there, huge club called shock 39...Sat in there and watched the Utd v Wigan match... the prices were sky high so we left there to get some drinks from another bar then head back...Walked into a quiet looking bar where we shown into a room....In this room, there were a few chairs all seated to face the same wall...The wall, wasn't a wall, but a massive window....Behind the window were rows of almost-naked women sat waving at you. Apparently you could chose which one you wanted. We walked straight out. Decided to get a cheap drink from a 7/11 then returned to the night club. Bumped into the French Embassy girls (remember them?), it was one of their birthdays so they were in Bangkok for a night out.

Next day was the usual recovery day; sleep, laundry, eat. Then back on the cheap 7/11 drinks and a few friendly games of poker with the travel-agent woman at the hotel. Now, when I say friendly games of poker...I mean games of poker that end in Craig calling the woman a 'Dick' several times.

Id already lost my money so was drinking and watching some football...they decided to play another hand, they disagreed over something trivial and it escalated to her saying he was a cheat and him calling her a dick repeatedly. It was quite funny from where I was sat.

Went to a couple bars and onto "The Club" Where I bumped into Nook...(remember her? met her in Koh Phi Phi)...it was one of her friends birthday so they were out in Bangkok. Deja-Vu.

After the club called the club had finished, we got some Pad - Thai and headed to Nooks apartment in Sukhumvit . Her apartment happens to be on the 37th floor, overlooking Bangkok. It was awesome, we drank red wine on the balcony then went to bed.

Next day was the usual rush back to the hotel before check-out. They let us have an extra hour so we could shower etc.

Headed to the airport and before we knew it, we landed in Sydney.

Met Chris in the airport (If you dont know who Chris is, read the little introduction bit on this website). He'd just got in from Tokyo. Checked into our mental hostel, which is a huge building with a bar, laundry, kitchen, internet cafe etc. Its expensive but compared to the places we've stayed in so far...its a 5 star.

Its expensive here. I wont say that again on this blog. OK once more, Its F***ing expensive.

We have booked a camper-van for next week...we will have this 4 berth bad-boy for 43 days, and will travel the entire East coast in it. Looking forward to hitting the road.

In the mean time, we are going to Campbell Town, about an hours train journey away from here...we are staying in a university house belonging to Margot...

Margot is a girl I met when lodging with Tashi back in Leeds...Tashi played Tchoukball with me and happens to be a bit of a bezzy...she introduced me to her Australian friend Margot, and she said we should visit...So we are...tomorrow...for a week. Should be awesome to go back to Uni life for a bit (already there to be honest, just ate a massive bowl of cheap pasta and sausages.)

So thats about all so far... one third of the way in...looking forward to the next part of the adventure...

Hope all are well,

Jay x